Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
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