turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
