it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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