I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
