dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Randomize
