I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later