Do you still have your period?
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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