Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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