May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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