I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Randomize
