I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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