Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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