Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize