All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
