I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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