you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
