i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
should my penis look like a turkey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize