Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
bring money and cleavage
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
