So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
