I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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