There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize