i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
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