her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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