He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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