Just fell off a train. Bad.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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