Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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