I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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