I can text with my tongue
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
whose parrot is this?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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