these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
