OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
