You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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