I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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