belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
