"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
