I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
