check it out our google latitudes are spooning
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize