What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
