I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Randomize
