Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
