You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize