sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
