i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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