i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize
