What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
