alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
