My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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