they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
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You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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