I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i drank out of a bidet.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Randomize
