I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
