I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize