Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
