are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
